This is like watching two monkeys at the puberty zoo. You won’t regret it, dad. When I kiss Jimmy Jr. under the disco ball, it’ll be like we’re all kissing Jimmy Jr under the disco ball. Ok then, see you on our date! Now my rash smells like bacon. But it doesn’t itch anymore. You…
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There’s a lot of carrots in that stew. Our toaster is also confused. It doesn’t know where bagels go. Buns…sen. I’m just not sure if I’ll be any good on the grill with one free hand.Gene, you saved us. I owe you my life. It’s an erotic friend fiction story that I just wrote. I…
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This is where I thrash. Crap attack? Don’t have one? I guess she doesn’t like wearing clothes. Please don’t tell Mom and Dad. Dr. Yap, once I was into you, but after seeing you torture my father, I think we should just be friends with dental benefits. Brr, it sure is cold in here. I…
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If I drunk text you and you’re asleep, don’t text me in the morning…that ship has sailed. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh You had me at horses, but then you lost me at corpses. I’m out of control. Buns…sen. Buns…sen. I had no idea there was so much butt touching in baseball. Thank you zombie boyfriends. I’m out of…
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How do you know a python ate it? Did it leave a note? I had no idea there was so much butt touching in baseball. My crotch is itchy. You won’t regret it, dad. When I kiss Jimmy Jr. under the disco ball, it’ll be like we’re all kissing Jimmy Jr under the disco ball.…
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Dad, you’re the best pimp a girl could ever have. He did? That’s the sleaziest, sneakiest, most romantic thing anyone’s ever done to me. I had no idea there was so much butt touching in baseball. I’m not spooked. What’s the next thing after spooked? I’m that. Do you think horses get songs stuck in…
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